People Pleasin’

I am a people pleaser.  I am well aware of this.  There is nothing necessarily wrong with wanting to create happiness for those around you; some may even say it is honourable.  I think that this could be true up until the point where you lose yourself in the process.  Most of my life I have diminished my worth in order to please those around me.  Most of my life I have felt worthless as a result.  That is what we would call unhealthy.  It is important to impact people’s lives in a positive manner and making people smile is a great thing to do, but I need to and am learning to find my worth separate from this.  My worth is not based on what I’ve done or thought or said.  I need to love myself first and that will transfer over to the other aspects of my life.  I can’t expect to be respected by my kids, my girlfriend, my friends or others if at first I don’t respect myself.  I will lose those I love eventually if I continue to devalue myself.  That is a scary reality that I do not want to come to fruition.  I have wants and needs like every other human out there and it is ok for me to stand up and express them.  It’s ok for me to go after these things and put value on my own feelings and desires.  I don’t need to be the welcome mat and I can spread happiness all while respecting myself.  This is an important thing for me to learn and I know there will be days that this will feel impossible, but when you replace “impossible” with”difficult” the sky is the limit!  PMA all day!! 



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