I’ve had a rough few days in the depression side of things. It’s been difficult to stay motivated and even more difficult to be positive. I’m not going to dwell on that today, however. I’m going to stand tall, lean on my friends and carry on. I’m going to be brave for my kids and I’m going to smile. How do I plan on doing all of this when I feel so low? By working my skinny little butt off. What a lot of people don’t realize is how much work has to go into a day when you suffer from mental illness. There are rarely sustainable “breaks” and simply functioning in society can be a feat near impossibility. I don’t say this for sympathy. I say this because it is true. So much of my life is spent convincing myself to keep moving that I often come across as rude or distant. I wake up, convince myself it’s a day worth getting up for, then convince myself that I’m a worthwhile individual and that I’m not hated by the General public. A lot of the day is like this and it’s difficult to stay on top of it. A useful skill is simply being mindful in these situations. Acknowledge that you have these thoughts, but simply watch them appear and disappear without attaching emotionally to them. It’s a skill that takes practice and you never quite master it. Nonetheless it is a good skill to hone. I need to practice this more often, but life seems to get busy and I forget about it. I’ve said it before, but I need to take a breath, gather myself and be mindful.