Forward Thinking

I am beating this. How do I know this? I’m waking up with hope in my heart and I am thinking less about her. I had two encounters with her yesterday and they went well. I didn’t cry, I didn’t ruminate and I didn’t want to beg. I realize that we had gotten to a point where we were no longer partners working together and had become quite toxic. The kids are better off, she is better off and I am better off. I’m not going to fight against this anymore and I’ve felt what I am and what I want for the future. I’m comfortable with me today and I’m going to be happy again. There is so much love in my heart and I’m going to use it for good. All in all I’m a good guy. I have my failures like anyone else and a lot of those were committed while I was married. My plan going forward is to not allow those to creep back in and control me. I will find someone I can share this new me with. Someone who will be herself and someone who will let me be myself. I don’t need another person; I want it for my future. I think it’s the realization that I don’t need another person to define me that has allowed me to take this step forward. I want her to be happy and I think she still cares enough to want the same for me. Maybe in the end we will get along and even be friends, but for now she’s happy and I’m happy. The kids are happy too. 20140629-113144-41504545.jpg

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