I really don’t want to write anything today. I’m angry and frustrated at this whole situation and I can’t seem to shake it off. I’m angry because I have no control of what is happening and frustrated because I’ve had no say in the matter. I hate this whole scene and today I just want to hide from everything and everyone. I’m working hard so I don’t spiral into one of my deep depressions and that is exhausting enough, let alone hearing people say to give her time and things could work out. I don’t know if that’s realistic or not, but the truth is I miss her. I can’t hide from that or ignore it, but I can’t hold onto it either. I can’t dwell and be “emo” about it all, but I need to acknowledge the feelings that are there.
I am all over the map recently. The emotions have been high and the bad thoughts are frequent. I’ve learned that challenging or shifting these thoughts can really downgrade the emotion involved. My judgements of the situation will work at exaggerating the emotion.