It is finally nice out and I plan on enjoying it. I have needed this to help reset my life. 33 and starting all over again is terrifying especially now that my job doesn’t start until the week of the 25th. It’s hard making living arrangements when you aren’t earning money. It’s a difficult position that I have been left in. I am finding that my resentment is growing with every day I am stuck in this state. That is unhealthy for ME. I need to think about my health more and do what is best for me. Holding grudges over being left with no money and no job and no home will not get me anywhere and being upset over her success and happiness over this will only hurt me. I’m stressed to my maximum capacity and it is difficult to be positive. I’m going to distract myself with skateboarding and sunshine today. I’m going to enjoy the moments of the day; I’m going to think about happy things instead of her. I’m going to smile back at girls that smile at me. I’m going to take compliments and not minimize them. Just a disclaimer, smiling back has nothing to do with me looking for a new girl and only to do with acknowledging that I may not be as undesirable as I think I am.