A Minute In Time

The reality of life is that it ends. It is not a surprise to anyone and it is no deep thought or major shift in the way we see life. I’m just stating the obvious in an attempt to get a greater thought out. What thought, you ask? I haven’t found it yet. I awoke with a deep feeling of dread this morning; as if something bad may happen. I get this feeling a lot and realize that it is part of my Anxiety Disorder and that I need to be mindful of it and not allow this feeling to overthrow my reason. It is amazing what the effects of some misfiring synapses can be. Today I’d like to punch each one in the throat as they are torturing my brain. I am trying to breathe and be aware of the moment, but the worries of an uncertain future are getting the best of me. My legs feel weak, my heart is pounding and my thoughts are jumbled. It is very hard to concentrate on the tasks at hand and the continuing work going on in my living room is exasperating things. I need to relax. I don’t want to head down the path to a breakdown again. These are the days where I need to rely on the skills I have been learning and not let the lies this sickness tells me to take over again.

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2 thoughts on “A Minute In Time

  1. Death should be of no surprise. We all know that one day we each must die. But, death does come as a surprise. It’s not natural. Technically it is, but emotionally and logically it doesn’t feel like it. It’s incomprehensible.

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