A Letter to my Children

Dear Children of Mine,

I write this letter to all three of you in hopes I can be forgiven. I trust that you are reading this when you are much older than now and you have moved on and have your families. I hope that when you read this that you have learned to forgive me for my behaviour over the years. I would not blame you if you had left me behind and forgotten I still exist. If that is the case, please hear what I say next. I’m sorry. I’m sorry for the yelling, I’m sorry for the times I just couldn’t get out of bed or off the couch. I’m sorry for being so distant and for crying with no reason. I’m sorry for my paranoia and my fear of leaving the house. I apologize for the days where I obsessed over the “mess”. I have not been the best dad to you and I wish I could do better. There were many good times when I could get a smile on my face and dance and play and sing. Do you remember those days? I pray to God that you do. I want you to know that I tried hard everyday. I fought a silent battle in my head and it took me away for days on end. I want you to know that I love you even if my many moods confused and scared you. I never meant to hurt you. I love more than you’ll ever know. I’ll always be your Daddy.

Love,

Dad

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6 thoughts on “A Letter to my Children

  1. Ryan … I had tears in my eyes in reading this blog today. It is so very evident how much you love your kids! It is also very evident to me how hard you work at trying to make life work for you and to do the best you can!! I believe that beyond all the struggles, your kids will always know how very much you loved them! Blessings to you Ryan ..and all the best in 2014!

  2. This was very touching. Your love for your children is obvious. You said, “I wish I could do better.” You can. As long as you have breath, you can always do better.

    No parent is perfect, but with each mistake we make, there is a lesson to be learned. Start with today. Make today great for them. Just take it one day at a time.

  3. Pingback: My House is a Mess and I’m at Work Thinking About It! | How are you? ...Good

  4. We keep journals of each of our children’s lives, focusing on love, positive personality traits and good times. Hopefully when they read them one day, those are times they’ll remember, too. Lovely post. And thanks for following me on Cold.

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